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Donna Esmeralda

Donna Esmeralda

Green stone runesDonna Esmeralda has an impressive stash of cash to give to you but first you must send her money. 

Apparently you have won $1800 and Donna Esmeralda has a cheque waiting for you.  To claim it all you need to do is fill out a form and send $49 by cheque or by giving your credit card details.

Mrs Esmeralda is so concerned about you that she ‘hand writes’ a letter to you personally saying she is astonished that you have not responded to her previous communications regarding your cheque for $1800.  We’re astonished at Mrs Esmeralda trying to pass off a mass produced printed letter as hand written.

It begs the question – if she does have some money to send why doesn’t she just take out the $49 fee she requires and send you the rest?

Apparently this fee is a ‘modest contribution’ to go towards the cost of issuing and sending you the cheque plus a ‘FREE Magical Octagonal Talisman’.   You will probably be better off buying a good luck trinket from your local markets and keeping the change from your $49.

After blowing up the fine print on the ScamNet photocopier we were just able to read what it says.  Here are some key points we liked:

  • The ‘main aim’ of the letter is for the ‘promotion of the magical octagonal talisman’.

  • “Cheque for $100,000 drawn up in your name” – is a game! You only have a chance with the countless others who receive this letter.

  • The present game is free to enter just send your entry in a plain white envelope – is the envelope that is provided plain enough or is that an automatic default?

  • The game may be called different names – to confuse you into entering more than once?

  • But “all incomplete or illegible addresses or forms will be eliminated” – illegible according to whom?

  • There is only one main prize of $100,000 – no surprises there.

  • The $1800 on offer to you is actually ‘special cheques’ in the form of ‘discount vouchers’ - are these even valid in Australia?

  • Donna Esmeralda reserves the right to cancel this game – especially if someone claims the $100,000!

  • No information will be released by Donna Esmeralda via the telephone or any other means – hmmm does she even exist?

Also in the fine print Donna Esmeralda says she reserves the right to award prizes in whole or part to a charitable organisation – If that really is the case, although we doubt it, don’t bother replying to claim your vouchers let her give them to a charity.